I am going to start a campaign. In fact I will send a petition to President Donald Trump if I can get enough signatures. I know that my liberal friends will get on board immediately, and I hope my conservative friends will do so as soon as they hear my logic for this campaign.
I want to ban the penny. But this has nothing to do with the idea that the penny cost so much to make and we don't use it anymore but it has to do with the fact that's undeniable; the penny is racist. You cannot argue with my logic.
First of all let's talk about the color of the penny. It is different from all of the other coins. No, I'm not talking about the Susan B. Anthony dollar or any of those coins that were created and minted in the last 20 to 30 years because those were created at a time when political correctness ruled.
I'm talking about the coins that, along with the penny, were created: when old racist white men made the decisions about what our money would look like. The penny is the only one that is a different color and it's darker.
And the penny is worth the least of all the other coins that we have. We value it less so we made it a darker color.
And as I said it is the least valuable of all the coins that we have. Kind of like how we treated black people in this country or anyone with darker skin for that matter.
Look who is on the front of the penny-Abraham Lincoln. Do you think that's a coincidence? There's no way that it is. We know well that Lincoln signed the Emancipation Proclamation. I'm sure that the people who made the decision about the penny wanted to point out to everyone the difference between the penny and the other coins.
Where can you use a penny these days? You can't put it into a vending machine to buy some potato chips or a candy bar or a soda. You can't even put it into a bubblegum machine to get a toy or a treat. There are pay phones still in this world but you've never been able to use a penny. It's kind of like saying: "we don't want your kind in here."
And what do you do when you get a penny in change at the convenience store or supermarket? You throw it away into a little container there on the counter hoping someone else will need it. If you see a penny on the ground in the parking lot you don't bend over to pick it up but you will for one of those silver coins. You value it less then the other coins, which are essentially white.
So you see, using "logic," we need to get rid of the penny because it is racist. There is no argument and if you disagree with me then you are a racist bigot.