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"DIRT," a book by I. Dirt


“DIRT”, a book by I. Dirt

By Barbara Jorgen Nance

  Everywhere you go you’re going to have dirt underfoot. It carpets the earth and holds all of us upright. If Dirt were to start writing mystery novels, they would soar to the top of best seller list. Archeologists have only scratched the surface as to the real mysteries that are hidden in dirt. We’ll never know all the secrets it clutches, just because we can’t move it all.

  One single pottery shard was unearthed on my property by some ground squirrels digging their tunnels next to our dry creek bed. Now, I’m pretty sure some native people passed this way at some point and there are most likely more artifacts buried somewhere around here. But where?  History and mystery go together like two peas in a pod and the pod is made of dirt. There’s that old saying, “give me the real dirt on that story." It means the real nitty-gritty. The most important part of the history or mystery story. The only one who could write the real nitty-gritty, bestselling mystery series of all time would be Dirt itself.

  Now dirt varies from one location to the next. For example, my New Mexico dirt is quite different from the California coastal dirt where I came from. I grew orchids in my front yard!
The soil was dark, rich and loamy. Living in New Mexico for the past seven years is quite a change. I’ve wandered around my own property like a desert hermit interviewing dirt clods. Searching for answers to the history here, but dirt is usually quiet and secretive. It wants you to dig down and get your hands dirty. It welcomes you to have interaction with it. It is lonely for our touch.

I will continue to hike in the southwest desert interviewing dirt. I can feel it in my bones that one clod will come forth at some time and announce, “I, Dirt, will write the book on dirt." To my surprise Dirt showed up and went on to say: “I will write the ultimate all time, bestselling mystery series ever to hit any printing press. I will keep you on the edge of your seat, burning midnight oil, to read about the mysteries that dirt holds. I will reveal long, lost historical secrets that have been buried and forgotten about." During an interview on a late night TV talk show, I.Dirt was quoted as saying:  “ It will be an endless undertaking to write such a series. A person would need several lifetimes to read all of what I have to say."

  After a long pause, I. Dirt stood up and announced: “Since this writing task would be never ending, it may not be a wise undertaking after all." Then he went on to say: “It’s better to let our imaginations fill in the blanks. We probably aren’t meant to know all the secrets hidden in dirt or where all the treasure is buried! Let the rabbits have the riches! Our lives need the mystery. The reward is in the quest for answers and where our imaginations take us on those journeys. If we were to know all the answers, we’d be bored and hit a flat spot. The unknown keeps us on our toes, interested and alert to possibilities." Then, I. Dirt turned and exited the stage, leaving us with more questions than answers.

I’ll probably suspend my interviews with dirt clods for now, but I will keep an eye out for any rabbits wearing an ancient Anasazi turquoise necklace.

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