"We Read Your Mail For You" Program

Nuacht Aoir

President Joe Biden To Announce New Labor Day Initiatives
Part One we read your mail for you program image 50

One of the Biden administration new initiatives for the US Postal Service

As we continue our exclusive reporting on the plans of the Administration of President Joseph (Joe) Biden, Nuacht Aoir has learned – exclusively – that the President will use Labor Day as the time he will announce two initiatives to create new jobs for Federal workers.

The first initiative will allow the United States Postal Service (USPS) to provide a service where postal workers will read your mail and then text the contents to you. To introduce the new service, the first 10 texts will be free. After that, each text will be billed at 50 cents each with each photo billed at $1.00 each.

"Through the 'We Read Your Mail For You' Program, Americans will be able to save time and the U S Postal Service will take a further step into the 21st century," according to the text of the speech to be given by President Biden. "In addition to the convenience of this service, we see great environmental value in this new initiative."

"We anticipate that fuel use by Federal vehicles will decrease dramatically," President Biden is anticipated to note in his speech to the American people. "We will no longer have to have postal workers travel from home to home to deliver mail. Instead, the mail will come to you in a way that befits today's America – by mobile telephone."

"Further, paper recycling will increase since all postal mail included in this program will be digitally copied," the President plans to say in his speech. "Digitized versions of the postal mail will then be readily available to our excellent Federal intelligence services in their quests to protect the Homeland."

The President goes on in the prepared remarks to note that the recycled paper will be used to create textbooks that boldly proclaim that the U S that views equality and equity as its guiding principles in the 21st century.

"We stand as a beacon on the hill," the President will state. "Postal workers will be retrained to open mail correctly and digitize the exterior of the mail packaging as well as all of the contents within the mail. After digitization is completed, postal workers will then text the important contents, including photos, to the recipients."

The "We Read Your Mail For You" Program is evidently the way that the Biden Administration plans to get around the pesky regulations that have officially governed the U S Post Office and the USPS for generations.

According to the FAQs document from the U S Postal Inspection Service, "First-Class letters and parcels are protected against search and seizure under the Fourth Amendment to the [U S] Constitution, and, as such, cannot be opened without a search warrant. If there is probable cause to believe the contents of a First-Class letter or parcel violate federal law, Postal Inspectors can obtain a search warrant to open the mail piece."

Please note that these official protections only apply to "First-Class letters and parcels."

The FAQs document from the U S Postal Inspection Service notes that "Other classes of mail do not contain private correspondence and therefore may be opened without a warrant."

President Biden came up with the idea for the "We Read Your Mail For You" Program on his own, we are told, based on reading copies of several old newspaper articles.

The newspaper articles were found by Federal investigators when they searched the President's home for classified materials. They were in a box marked "Important Documents" that Federal agents found news articles in the garage at the President's home in Delaware.

Since the newspaper articles were deemed "not classified," the Federal investigators returned them to the President.

The first news article was printed on July 12, 1913, in The Pittsburgh Press. The headline was "Girls Complain Spoony Clerk Reads Their Mail."

According to the newspaper, "Postmaster General Burleson is called upon to solve many riddles. The latest is a quarrel between young women patrons of the post office in a thriving western town and a woman clerk. The row was brought to Mr. Burleson's attention by the following letter:"

"Dear Sir: The girl in the postoffice here reads us girls' cards and tells us what is in them. Also has a beau, her man, standing at the window spooning all the time. Wish you would look into it, and change, for we are all very sick of her. Farmers cannot get to the window after their mail."

"I remain _______________"
"US Girls of ____________"

After reviewing this newspaper article, the President had one of his excellent ideas: Have postal workers officially read the mail of the American people – not just "young women patrons…in a thriving western town."

His idea was solidified after reading a second news article from a town just down the road from Scranton. This news article, printed on December 17, 1915, in The Wilkes-Barre Record, reported that "It is stated that one thousand English women have been appointed as censors to look over the mail coming from the United States. These jobs ought not to go a-begging. Imagine a thousand women with nothing to do but open and read other people's mail."

The third news article in the box that caught the attention of the President (after all, he cannot be bothered with spending his time worrying about the Taliban takeover in Afghanistan or fentanyl products being produced in a nearby country) was from The Cincinnati Enquirer.

On April 27, 1924, that newspaper printed a news article from the day before where it was reported that "Clerks To Read Mail" in Paris, France. On April 26 of that year, reports were made that "The wholesale reading of post cards is proposed during a May Day strike by French postal employees in an effort to obtain an increase of wages."

The news article stated that "The clerks plan to weigh all letters, examine every stamp, and read all postcards because the regulations prescribe that insults and threats to the recipients must not be written on the cards."

It was noted in the news article that "This would paralyze the service. The authorities plan to discharge any over-anxious letter-weighers or card-perusers."

To President Biden, this confirmed that his idea for the "We Read Your Mail For You" Program was right on target: Provide work for postal workers – union workers – and increase wages. A win-win situation.

In his Labor Day Proclamation in 2022, President Biden stated that "I said from the start that I would be the most pro-worker and pro-union President in American history, and I am keeping that promise."

Indeed, he is.

As Presidential aides scurried to develop the details of this new initiative, several were tasked with finding precedents that could be pointed to by the Administration. In particular, these Presidential aides sought out examples where the elites of both the Republican and Democratic parties supported similar efforts.

Nuacht Aoir has obtained – exclusively – the initial research documents assembled by the Administration of President Biden.

Presidential aides noted that The Enid Weekly Wave reported on November 25, 1897, that postal workers were reading – and keeping – items mailed through the Post Office in Oklahoma. In a front-page news article, the newspaper indicated that it had some "authentic evidence" that post masters were "allowing their personal friends who are not subscribers [to] read other peoples' papers which never get back into the post office."

According to the newspaper, copies of the newspaper were being dropped off at the post office for delivery to customers; the postal workers were then reading the newspapers even though they were not subscribers to the paper.

"No postmaster has any right to allow anybody to read other people's mail and some of these days we will be compelled to make an example of somebody according to law," noted the newspaper article.

The Presidential aides found more recent news reports from the mid-1980s that detailed how postal workers may have opened mail that contained pornographic material. (Can you imagine such activities? Horrors!) The postal workers allegedly "read" this mail; some of the mail allegedly "disappeared."

An aide to President Biden, when asked how the USPS would handle texting content of (ahem) "adult-themed" material, the aide explained that the USPS worker would simply text the words and the photos just as if it was mail from Aunt Trudy in Pasadena or Uncle Tim in Peoria.

"The President believes in equality and equity for all," stated the aide to President Biden. "Our great leader believes that all Americans should be able to access reading materials that are of scientific and educational values."

"This type of mail would provide great opportunities for the USPS to increase revenue due to the multitudes of photos included in each piece of mail," the Presidential aide continued. "In addition, this type of mail could be considered a benefit to working at the USPS. We foresee that many Americans may seek out jobs with the USPS to be able to gain scientific knowledge and educational guidance from these mail items."

The Presidential aide also noted that Federal workers who protect our country from evil will be able to view all photos from these mail items.

"Of course, members of our intelligence community would only view these types of photos in their capacities of protecting the United States of America," the Presidential aide explained. "It is important that our fine intelligence officers be aware of all aspects of American life."

Beyond the adult-themed mail, the Presidential aides found a document from the U S Postal Inspection Service - Office of Counsel dated April 22, 2016. This letter detailed a number of Freedom of Information requests made to the U S Postal Inspection Service during a specific time period.

Among the 647 entries listed in spreadsheets attached to this letter, there were two of interest to the Presidential aides doing research: On June 10, 2013, there was a request made by an individual regarding the "Mail Isolation Control and Tracking (MICT) Program." Another individual requested information about the "Mail Cover Program" and the "Mail Isolation Control and Tracking Program" on July 5, 2013.

You never heard of the "Mail Cover Program" and the "Mail Isolation and Tracking Program"?

These are programs that allow law enforcement officials to view the exterior of your mail without your consent and without your knowledge.

An audit report was issued by the Office of Inspector General of the U S Postal Inspection Service on December 3, 2013. The audit was entitled "Mail Isolation, Control, and Tracking." When you click on "View PDF" of the audit, though, you are directed to a page that states that "We did not post this report due to concerns with information protected under the Freedom of Information Act."

Another audit of these surveillance efforts was issued to the public on May 28, 2014. A summary of this audit stated:

"In fiscal year 2013, the U S Postal Inspection Service processed about 49,000 mail covers. A mail cover is an investigative tool used to record data appearing on the outside of a mailpiece. Law enforcement agencies use this information to protect national security; locate fugitives; obtain evidence; or help identify property, proceeds, or assets forfeitable under criminal law. A mail cover is justified when it will further an investigation or provide evidence of a crime. The U S Postal Service is responsible for recording and forwarding the data to the Postal Inspection Service for further processing. Postal Service and law enforcement officials must ensure compliance with privacy policies to protect the privacy of customers, employees, and other individuals' information. Our objective was to determine whether the Postal Service and Postal Inspection Service are effectively and efficiently handling mail covers according to Postal Service and federal requirements."

A link is provided at the end of the summary of this audit for those who want to "Read full report."

The problem is that if you want to read this actual report, well, you can't.

When you click on the option to "Read full report," you are directed to a page that states "Page not found – The requested page could not be found."

Why would the USPS decline to provide copies of audits produced in 2013 and 2014?

(And you thought we made this stuff up from thin air?)

On May 17, 2023, 8 U S Senators sent a letter to the U S Postal Inspection Service with further details that may be of interest to Americans. Among the items noted by the senators, two details stood out:

"The risk of abuse of mail covers is not theoretical. There is a long history of documented abuses of postal surveillance. The Senate Select Committee to Study Governmental Operations with Respect to Intelligence Activities, chaired by Senator Frank Church, revealed in 1976, that the Central Intelligence Agency (CIA) had photographed the exteriors of over two million pieces of mail and opened hundreds of thousands of letters from prominent activists and authors. This program was one of several mail cover abuses exposed by the Church Committee, and that the Federal Bureau of Investigation and CIA began conducting illegal surveillance of the mail in the 1940s."

"According to the OIG [Office of the Inspector General] report, the top agencies requesting mail covers were the Internal Revenue Service, the Federal Bureau of Investigation, the Drug Enforcement Administration and the Department of Homeland Security."

When asked why the Federal government should be reading people's mail – even for convenience or to save the environment – an aide to President Joe Biden referenced remarks from a top military official in 1976 that several newspapers quoted in 1977:

"If any citizen of this country is so concerned about his mail being read or is concerned about his presence in a meeting being noted, I'd say we ought to read his mail and we ought to know what the hell he has done."

The Presidential aide noted that the military official was appointed during the Administration of Richard Nixon, a Republican, and made these specific remarks while serving during the Administration of Gerald Ford, also a Republican.

It appears that the Biden Administration has figured out a legal way to fulfill the goals outlined in that 1976 speech through the "We Read Your Mail For You" Program.

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Contact Richard McDonough at nuachtaoir@protonmail.com .

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